Save Me From the Self Righteous

Save Me From the Self Righteous

I just read on article online at the NPR website that talked about a study that indicated that diet may have some effect on children with ADHD.  In other words, changing a child’s diet may have as much effect on their condition as medication does.  Although the article was vague about details I thought it was interesting and exciting for those parents who are dealing with this.  I went on to read some of the comments people left after the article.  I should know better.  Anytime I read comments on pretty much any website I get upset.  Some people can be so stupid and thoughtless.  “If parents would just feed their children healthy food, take away their tv and cell phones and make them get outside and exercise, they wouldn’t have a problem.”  Excuse me?  I will agree that our society has developed into a people who spend too much time at leisure and not enough time being active, but to point fingers and say that these parents have caused the child’s ADHD is ludicrous! 

It’s the same with Type 2 diabetes.  I’ve never had anyone say to my face, “gosh, if you just hadn’t gained all that weight you probably wouldn’t be a diabetic” but I can almost hear them whispering, can you?  (I guess the people I know are either too polite or two-faced)  There is a stigma surrounding Type 2 diabetes.  Too much has been published and discussed about how diet and lifestyle has caused an epidemic of this disease.  That’s all true, but to hear people say that “all you have to do” is eat a healthier diet and exercise and you’ll get better really pisses me off. Or, “You poor thing, too bad you can’t eat some cake.”  It makes me want to scream sometimes.  Of course I can eat cake, dammit!  I just have to pay attention and adjust what else I’m eating.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve beaten myself up thinking that maybe I did do this to myself.  That certainly doesn’t do me any good.  I can’t change what has happened in the past, I can only deal with it now in an intelligent and thoughtful way.  You know what?   My grand father had diabetes.  He was a hard working police man, I have seen photos of him and he was certainly not over weight. My mother was diagnosed later in life, with diabetes.  Sure she had an addiction to pepsi, but she didn't spend the day eating bon bons.  For years I thought I was the unlucky one in my family. It seemed I got all the "bad" genes iin tn the family.  I was the only one with diabetes, DBD, and CHF.

So what’s the point of this post (other than the fact that it felt GOOD to rant a bit)?  It’s my wish that people would be more compassionate; that they would educate themselves about a topic before making assumptions and opening their big traps.  Think about what life would be like if you had to deal with a child who has ADHD.  Be concerned that your friend has diabetes and needs to keep strict control but don’t pity them or look down your nose at them like it’s their fault.  You can’t know everything about someone’s life; what factors may have put them where they are now.  Don’t assume that they “did this to themselves”.  If you’re a thin, healthy person who has never had the misfortune of contracting a disease and whose children are perfect in every way…..wait, I don’t think people like that really exist.  I guess I’m fantasizing.